Bleeechhhh. Pardon me while I hawk up great big green loogeys. Pneumonia sucks ass, especially when you've got no one to whine about being sick to.

No one to bring you chicken noodle soup. No one to make hot tea and bring you coloring books just to make your day less BORING. Poor me. Life sucks. Hard not to feel like nobody loves me except for the dogs (and frankly, they're a more than a little frightened by the ungodly coughing spazzes that produce something far more disgusting than the dead worms they seem compelled to roll their bodies around in.)

*sigh*. All I need now is the return of my paralyzing depression and I'll be just about hammered into submission.

Just shoot me now.

Are you kidding me? International Product Manager for shopping.com?! You mean people get paid to do that? And all this time I thought there was just no way to combine all of my strengths into one single job. Keep your fingers crossed - I've even got my pinkie toes crossed. Which, if you think about it, makes it extremely difficult to wear my fabulous new Jimmy Choos, but whatever...